❧ Is it bringing you JOY despite the temporary hardships?
❧ Do you FEEL you're meant to stick with it?
❧ Do you actually find the challenge of it exhilarating?
❧ If you quit, would you regret it 5 years down the line?
❧ And last but not least, is the learning you can take from it, even if it doesn't work out, worth the effort?
Once you know that something really matters to you, and you can see it for the huge learning opportunity that it is, you'll find it much easier to put in whatever effort it requires. You'll see the proverbial light at the end of the tunnel, and the knowing that this process is beneficial to your personal development will be energising. (a bit like sweating at the gym is for your body 💪)
It's like walking an amazing path that has some challenging rocky patches ... those rocky patches don't mean that the path is not worth walking. They can even make it more exciting, and you learn to navigate a rocky patch, how valuable is that!
So in the context of relationships, if before I thought that a sign of the "right" relationship was that it was always in perfect flow without having to put much work into it (I know I know! I was younger then *blush*), I now know that precisely BECAUSE it's so right it's worth putting work into.
Same goes for other areas, such as your career, or a business you love, or a dream you have.
By putting in the work, you grow as a person, and often your career/business/relationship/dream grows as a result. But at the very least you've got the personal growth and that is priceless!
Whilst there may be hard or scary times, when you put yourself on the line, put a lot in and don't know how it will work out, what it means is you're being brave. You're taking a risk, for the potentially big payoff. It might turn out well, or it might not. But you are living courageously and fully.
So whether something we care about is worth persevering with or not, isn't measured by just how well things are going. It's measured by how much we care about it and how much we're growing through it as a person.
When things aren't going "ideally" for you, don't be too quick to judge the endeavour as the wrong thing to pursue. Or a relationship to ditch.
Rather, assess how much you care about it.
And then if it's really worth it for you, re-commit with all you've got. Make a firm decision, and be open for the right actions to occur to you.